Dear Alice,
In my humble experience I've found that is seems the more one endevours toward a certain ability; the more it eludes grasp.
It seems often that when one gives up or releases expectation and goes back to the basics, then things start kicking in.
Wonderful and adventure but often not exactly the original desire. I would suggest being open to whatever. Your Guides might have something better in store. If you get mono focused on one thing, you might miss it.
Namaste,
Michael
