Wow. i never really thought of it that way feather... the reason i cant go on a vision quest is because i am a coward. i am can't approuch my parents and say "Hey guys im going to the woods to find myself.. ill see you in 6 mounths." (not to say my parents dont support me because they do.)
The other reason is because I fear change. I mean real change. I fear that i might lose myself. I know its stupid but it is there. its so much easyer to keep my head down and forget. But i know that i can't do that forever.
One time i asked god in prayer that if i got a sign i would try to heal people. i got my sign. the dots that look like:
o
o o
o
so i went searching on the web trying to find this sign. (off and on) and i found it on a reiki board w/ a pair of hands in the middle. (during my meditations and trying to find my calling i would always see hands.) so i am learning Reiki. So i am gonig down my road. but a part of me wants to stop. a part of me wants to start screaming to anyone that will listen for any kind of help. but a third knows i have to keep going. i know i can't stop. I fear so much because i understand so little.
truth_seeker
P.s. how do you guys use reiki in your everday lives?? we are learing something that can make a difference in the world. when i look up at the daytime sky i see "fire flies" (little balls of white light that fly around.) my mom taught me how to see them. when you look into the sky just know that they are there. (like the zoo books when you look for the hiding animal. you have to know that it is there before you can see it.) i want to know if anyone can see them. so far its just me and my mom.
thanks as alwys guy and gals. this is probably the only place that really can understand. for that i am thankful.
