The Hoboken Cafe 

Anyone ever relocate for a job? recommend it? hate it?
My dept is being moved to Chicago, and I'm probably be offered a promotion of some sort (find out next week the gritty details).

On the other hand, I have a pretty good possibility of getting a similiar position (asst editor) for a test prep publisher w/ in here in nyc (also find this out next week, have a second intervew).

I'm going to probably have to decide -- if I get offered both -- in a week or less, so I'm sort of freaking out.

Chicago'd mean being car-trip distance to a lot of my family; leaving nyc would mean ditching a 3-yr relationship, but probably actually having some $ to spare.

I don't really expect much in the way of advice, and I don't really post here often, but I figured it might make me feel a *little* better.

Erika,

First of all, remember that you don't yet know what decision you will have to make, so don't freak out about it. secondly, realize that while change can be scary it also provides oportunity for better things.

If you are presented with a choice, don't listen to the fears of what might go wrong, but think of where you want to be. Where would you be happy? Many times when we have these decisions, we know what we want to do but our own fears give us doubt. Think of what you really want to do and don't be afraid to persue it.

-Mike

ejd said on 5/31/2004 2:07 PM

>Anyone ever relocate for a job? recommend it? hate it?
>My dept is being moved to Chicago, and I'm probably be offered a promotion of some sort (find out next week the gritty details).
>
>On the other hand, I have a pretty good possibility of getting a similiar position (asst editor) for a test prep publisher w/ in here in nyc (also find this out next week, have a second intervew).
>
>I'm going to probably have to decide -- if I get offered both -- in a week or less, so I'm sort of freaking out.
>
>Chicago'd mean being car-trip distance to a lot of my family; leaving nyc would mean ditching a 3-yr relationship, but probably actually having some $ to spare.
>
>I don't really expect much in the way of advice, and I don't really post here often, but I figured it might make me feel a *little* better.

Hi ..I relocated from RI to NJ ..although I am from NJ originally it was a hard thing to do at first..I have a house there ..my security blanket..my friends..and when I moved here to Hoboken area I had to meet all new people , make new friends..I was very unsure of what to expect but then I realized that when you let go of things and just do..everything works out..this turned out to be one of the best experiences and decisions that I made as I have now some of the best friends in the world and have experienced things that I probably never would have ..and guess what I know deep in my heart I always have a home back in RI ..but right now this is where I belong..as far as the relationship..why give it up...I have had long distance relationships and they can work ..you have to go with your gut on this one ..sit down and search deep down in side ..dont freak out..the answers will come to you ..just believe in what you decide and trust your gut..Hope this helps...Good Luck with whatever you decide...

Hi i don't know you but a good piece of advised is always good. I'm speaking from experience.It's time to get out there and make a move.This might be the move for you. Everything new at first is scary, but you won't know if its for you unless you try it with your eyes wide open.I move to Canada a spare of the moment thing.And i was scared shitless,to my surprise i stood for 1 year and learn the language.I'm back because i realized iam a true blue NEW YORKER. GOOD LUCK!!!!

LIL NANCY AKA FANCYGIRL

I picked up and moved to the pacific northwest from the east coast with no job, money, place to stay, etc....and had two of the best years of my life. the dismal weather and my family/friends are what brought me back east. It's a tough decision to say the least, but you just have to do what feels right. change is scary, but it can also be a hell of a lot of fun! I think in your case you would have to determine how serious is your commitment to this 3-year relationship and how this would affect your partner......

Do you love your job enough to move? Do you love your boyfriend enough to stay? Would your boyfriend consider joining you?

That said, Chicago is a great city that is far more affordable than Hoboken.

Thanks for all the advice.. (I'll write a little more later).

Anyway, right now it looks like I have until June 15. I got my job offer -- it's not exactly what I wanted. But it is about a substantial raise, which I definately wouldn't get here, and some supervisory experience. They're giving me a lot of my current duties, but on a formal, instead of an informal basis. If I really want to go I could probably negotiate for a slightly different role.

There's one potential offer (find out next week) and one job lead in NYC.

I'm still at a loss, but getting a little closer to clarity.