First of all, please accept my apologies for the last few days of the site being down. I was not able to take care of things due to some personal events and my sister having an operation on her knee (had to go and visit the family).
So now we have to address the recent problems that we have had. I say we because this is a community, and while I have built the software that allows us to communicate I cannot control how people will use it. I can set guidlines and I can delete posts, but it is ultimitly the users of the site who will make it into a community. I have been doing a lot of thinking about what to say right now and I would like to start off with some quotes that where posted on another site that I found inspiring:
-If you and I are having a single thought of violence or hatred against anyone in the world at this moment, we are contributing to the wounding of the world.--Deepak Chopra
-Nothing is so strong as gentleness; nothing so gentle as real strength.--St. Francis de Sales
-You can no more win a war than win an earthqauke.--Jeanette Rankin
-There are many in the world who are dying for a peace of bread but there are many more dying for a piece of love.--Mother Teresa
-Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace.--Buddha
-When will our consciences grow so tender that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it?--Eleanor Roosevelt
-There never was a good war or a bad peace.--Benjamin Franklin
-Imagine.Give peace a chance.--John Lennon
The purpose of this whole site is to provide a platform that will allow people to meet new people and make new friends. Getting into nasty arguments not only directly conflicts with the fundamental purpose of the site but destroys the atmosphere for everyone using it. In order for this to succeed the boards must have a friendly and inviting atmosphere. I have removed the thread with the fighting, but Elmermaid had made a post that I would like to repeat:
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I think part of the problem is that it is difficult to detect sarcasm when we post our feelings/ reactions in writing. maybe we can get together more often and get to know each other better, that way we won't misunderstand the way we write/joke around/ etc...
elmermaid
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There is so much information lost when you put your words into writing. you never really know what the poster was thinking when the post was written and it's easy to misconstrue an innocent remark as an attack or insult. This, of course, can very frequently lead to real attacks and insults and this can result in people actually hating each other all because of some misunderstanding. So Please remember that feeling hatred towards anyone contributes to the wounding of the world.
So how can we continue without getting into fights? For one thing, I will be putting up a posting rules page and I would like the input of anyone who would like to contribute to sugest rules and examples. Please email me with your ideas.
There is one main overiding rule. That is:
Do not personally attack, harass or insult another person.
An argument takes at least two people and there is a real simple way to prevent fights. If someone says something that upsets you, just don't reply. Never post when you are angry because the anger will come out in your post. Anger feeds on anger and it will only lead to bad things. I know it's hard but simply not replying is the best thing to do.
I would love to see this site be a warm, friendly and accepting community. There are many people who get a lot out of it, many people have made new friends and I have received numerous emails from people who enjoy it and do not want to see it go away. The choice of what you make of this site is yours. Please choose wisely.
-Mike
