The Reiki Cafe 

Hi everyone,

I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did. It was shared by someone on another board.

The most powerful revelation we can ever experience is that of our self. It's been so long since we were totally open and beyond the fear of the possibility of hurt, that we keep our hearts and minds concealed from the world. Self revelation is not some kind of performance, or the seeking of attention - it is the outcome of the healing of our broken hearts - it is the result of many periods of introspection and meditation where we have seen who and what we really are, as opposed to who and what others have tried to make us. We are able to open and truly reveal ourselves when we see that all our hurts, all our pain, was self-inflicted. That's not easy to see, not easy to accept, but when we do, we realise no one can hurt us unless we let them. They can harm our body, but not our minds, unless we give them permission. This inner realisation allows us to be comfortable, unthreatened, safe in moments of self-revelation.

With light and love,
Featherpoint

I think that's very true. : ) Revealing ourselves is a wonderful thing. Very powerful. It's how i had the most wonderful spiritual experience of my life. I set aside not only how i felt others percieved me but how i percieved myself and allowed myself to be open to the fact i didn't know myself even if i thought i did and allowed Me to tell me who I was. Then BAM entered Being. Was a remarkable experience.

hi featherpoint

Thank you for sharing this wonderful message

love and light

Ian

Otoharo!

Dave, this is wonderful to hear. Thanks for sharing this.

finality

Beautiful and inspiring but so very untrue!!

“They can harm our body, but not our minds, unless we give them permission.”

I would like to see you what would happen to you if you saw your parents tortured to death, your house burned down, and have the same people rape you then chop off a part of your body….I would then like to see you take the position that I can only be hurt if I give my permission!!

I have heard that being in solitary confinement for a month or two can be a bit disturbing.

While it is true that some who are dying long slow painful deaths are happy most are not. This is not by choice.

Little children who are molested, beaten, abandoned, starved, etc. tend to have emotional issues as they grow up. The issues they have are not by choice and they cannot be overcome by a simple choice either. (“no one can hurt us unless we let them”, really?)

Sleep deprivation can have sever emotional ramification, not only if give permission.

I could go on and on.
The point is we can be hurt without giving permission

Rich

all our hurts, all our pain, was self-inflicted. That's not easy to see, not easy to accept, but when we do, we realise no one can hurt us unless we let them. They can harm our body, but not our minds, unless we give them permission.

I disagree. I don't think the message was about the physical but about the mental/emotional. And in that I feel it's very true. We have the decision to be upset hurt or angered by anything. Can I stop someone from shooting me in the spine and paralyzing me from the waist down? No, barring of course that the fear unlocks my amazing superhuman powers. But as cool as that would be I really really really doubt it. : ) However, how I choose to react to the situation. Whether I choose to be unhappy and let it ruin my life or choose to adapt to the situation , accept that I cannot change it and decide to live life as best as I can is entirely up to me.
The decision to not be hampered by these things is up to the individual. No matter what we have the choice. Noone can take that from us. Does this mean it's easy in every situation? Nope, sure doesn't. But we have that choice. When we decide to be pissed off or feel violated we make that decision just as we make the decision to be happy when something good happens in our lives. We choose how to respond to what life throws at us and the decision is solely ours.

You touched on some key points.

Yes, we decide how to react
No, not in all cases all of the time

Being paralyzed from the waist down after a shooting is a major shock and trauma. Yes we can decide to be happy and not let it ruin our life. But we may need some time to get over the shock, pain, depression, etc first.

My point really was that….I get tired of New Age fluff that makes it all sound so easy, “just decide to be happy”, “No one can hurt you unless you let them” It is not always that easy. The study of Yoga, Chi Gung, Tao, Reiki, NLP, Meditation, EFT can make it easier but what about the people who have not been exposed to these arts/paths?

“No one can hurt you unless you let them” This can be an inspiring saying that can cause one to think in very empowering directions…but it is just not factually true.

rich

It's not true for you. That is your decision. That does not mean it is not factual truth for noone else. : )
If we choose not to adhere to this philosophy in all aspects of our lives. That to is choice.
Shock and mental trauma occurr because of how we view things. All things just are. When we understand and change our mindset to know that they just are. Then they do not affect us in the same way they used to.
You can choose not to believe in it. That is your choice. If you want to view it as different than you're more than entitled to. But this does not mean it's new age fluff. Not to mention this teaching is in far more than just new age philosophies.
As always I can't say I've aways been able to adhere to this. But I think there have been alot of times in my life where I have firmly stood my ground in not being affected by something and therefore have not been affected by it. So for me and for others we know it is true even if very few are able to live this in totality this does not make it not true.

I sit here thinking about my life and the topic of this discussion. Think to myself......If anyone was "messed up" because of events that happened to them: Satanist grandmother that also had a "thing" for little girls, abducted and repeatedly raped and tortured over a three day period.....left naked for dead in my car, a doctor that said it was all MY fault. Why is it that I am not angry, hurt, hostile to menfolk, depressed.....etc?

I think it must be something inside me that I cannot name. Watching my mother work through her troubles taught me that hurt people hurt people. I resolved to not be a person that hurt people......to not give the people that hurt me anymore of my life than they already had. The ignorant intern that caused me to leave the hospital without making a police report or get my ounds healed was just that, ignorant. He gave me the drive to learn alternative healing methods. So, between him and the native lady that had already started my training, I have learned much more than I ever would have.

blackeath

All I gotta say is . " Go Grrly!"
Philosophy in action. If you can get through that it's an example other folks can as well.

From Featherpoint's post, "We are able to open and truly reveal ourselves when we see that all our hurts, all our pain, was self-inflicted. That's not easy to see, not easy to accept, but when we do, we realise no one can hurt us unless we let them. They can harm our body, but not our minds, unless we give them permission. This inner realisation allows us to be comfortable, unthreatened, safe in moments of self-revelation."

For instance in Blackearth's post.. I do not personally believe "all of our hurts, all of our pain, was/is self-inflicted. When in the now of being raped, tortured and left for dead there certainly will be physical, emotional and spiritual hurt and pain and this is most certainly placed upon us by another. During this event how can one's mind say this I am accepting? This event I am self-inflicting?
This is especially true when a child has endured something like this. It is with physical growth and the mind maturing from these life experiences that then the reality of dealing with these past trauma's with personal heart felt love and hard work that they can be dealt with and healed. Working on forgiveness of self and the others. Healing of the hurts and wounds with the realization that our power, our energy, was taken away from us and that we now will reclaim it and not allow these events or these people to have any more power over us in the now. We are wiser and healed and know that we could never do this same thing to another.

These events are not the same events like getting hurt or upset that someone did not invite you to "the party." Or someone says, have you gained weight, those pants look a little tight? Those every day little events are the one's we can choose to be affected by or not.

By our attitude, acceptance and perceptions of all of our lives experiences we then can live our life in more perfect balance and energy. We learn as we grow and mature. We take back control of our lives from healing the old hurtful experiences. We have new tools to deal with any new experiences.

What does not kill us, only makes us stronger.
Don't sweat the small stuff.
Onward and upward.

Donna

Hi All

I agree in part to what is being said, as the mind is ego and ego can be hurt. I would personally replace the word mind with the word soul. This is the part of us that can only be harmed by ourselves.

Love and light

Ian

Well not to say this is fact. Just something to think on. I still don't think the point is that we make a rapist come into our lives.One thing to consider is why we don't like rape. If we never held the position that our bodies were sacred and we have "special places" etc. It's just a hunk of meat used for transportation through the earthly experience. Than we might very well not be as affected by rape. This of course is just an example. I'm not saying anyone raped or abused had the wrong attitude when they were upset. Merely that how we view things affects what we are shocked and traumatized by.
Take me and death for instance. I am the wierd one on this but even before I became a more spiritual person death just wasn't a big deal to me. People die. They move on to another level of existance. Why be upset,? And it never really seemed to affect me the same as it does others around me. Any difficulties I usually have are in relating to other folks during the grieving process.
Now something else i wouldn't state as fact just something to digest is what if we did literally cause these things to happen from past life issues. Maybe we brought huge amounts of negativity with us. This manifests as these horrid "traumatizing" things that occurr. this is of course just me making a statement please don't think that i'm saying this is how it is definitely.Just a possibility.After all if we put out positive and positive comes back to us and the same with negative then perhaps if we were extremely negative in a previous life and pass on before it all manifests it builds up and smacks us in the face in the next life.

Otoharo!

Conflagration, I am not only just replying to you but to the thread in general. The new age teaching is the ancient teaching. We plan our lives before coming. We either create our reality or allow it. We agree to certain events before hand, that is, in spirit level we make agreements regarding the next day's event, etc. However, it was never meant that living would be as painful as it has come to be on earth. I am living with the realization that I, as an individual, some 20,000 years ago had a large part in causing this to be so. I am a stickler for rules in this lifetime as a reasult of having broken rules so drastically in that past. What a motivation!

finality

Have always believed that. Lessons are not just karma....they are often things we chose to experience. These things can be changed. One of the nicer blessings of free will. It is easy to bite off more than we care to chew when we are on the other side. I think that is the "something inside" that I have always had....the remembrance and knowing. Never feared death...not for self or others.

blackearth

You make some very fine points. But…( I just love a good debate)

“Shock and mental trauma occurr because of how we view things. All things just are.”

This is true but…
99% of the time for 99% of all people certain events are shocking and lead to unpleasant feelings. This can be overcome/out grown/transcended but it takes a good degree of spiritual/psychological development. Most people do not choose their sense of identity, their beliefs and the thoughts and feelings that accompany. Most people react. Even once you know that you can choose your sense of identity, your beliefs and the thoughts and feelings that accompany it can take years of work to actually do it. Of course it can happen in a second but it usually takes years, decades or lifetimes.

From the original posting,
“…all our pain, was self-inflicted. That's not easy to see, not easy to accept, but when we do, we realise no one can hurt us unless we let them.”

It may be true, as finality pointed out, that we choose our experiences in this life long before this life. But we are unaware of this an it is not chosen by what we identify as self in this life. Our experience of this life is that of events happening to us.

So to say that only we can hurt our self may be true when realizing that it was our self that choose our experience on very deep unconscious levels but it is not true to say that the self we know of as “me” can not be hurt by others. (this is difficult stuff to wrote about because I am writing about 2 levels of existence, the relative and the absolute)

rich

Well i'm undecided as to whether we do choose our lessons or not. But i believe it totally possible. Whether we determine them on the other side or it is decided for us by the Divine. I don't think it's a matter of biting off more than we can chew. I think it is known either by us or by the Divine that we can handle these situations whether or not we think we can while currently incarnated.

I understand what you're saying on both levels just fine. But yeah i understand the difficulty in trying to express these kinds of things.
In the event we did choose to have a specific experience, then in essence the person harming us is doing so because we set it up. I don't see the point of differentiating between relative and absolute there. Were we in a different state of existence? Sure. But it's still us whether there or here even if we understand far more there. So then we are responsible.
I agree that the majority would handle many situations the same. Part of not letting these things affect us is simple awareness of these concepts. Now granted it is difficult to acknowledge and accept these things it is still possible. And in alot of ways we are the ones overcomplicating the whole process. Many people do not choose this as part of their path. Therefore they are not going to interpret things from this point of view. But for myself I don't feel these philosophies we are discussing are not true for all only that not everyone accepts them.

Featherpoint,

Hi.

It is said that when we know our Shadow no other can harm us in any way.

Cheers,

RC

Blackearth

I am honored to know you.

Blessing
Be

I think we can at least choose which issues we want to work on. Then we can have our chosen issues well tackled and the lessons that we learn well mastered.

I also think if there is a Divine voice waiting to be heard, I take my chances. Cause I know I cannot really live without speech....
Therefore, I see the need to mantain positive relationship all round...

Starjasmine, staying in the momments on self enlightenment :)
Thanks for the possibilies of building up a wise thoughts bank!

all :)s all round.

ps: collected these phrases while reading:
remove ourselves as possible targets for getting hurt
avoid being affected by intended pain in the long term
let the dominant feeling is a peaceful one! :)

ok, I'll leave it as that .... for a while
u know that is always too much to say.... where is the audience? he he