The Reiki Cafe 

Hi,

I am about to take a psychology class and am noticing my mannerisms. One thing I notice is how I smile nervously around or with some people I make eyecontact with or meet or am around alot even. Mostly men. What is that all about? I have been told it's a sign of nervousness. How do I get to the bottom of it. Any suggestions?

peace,

Prosperity

One thing I would suggest is to notice what is going on in your body (i.e. your major chakras) when you are doing the nervous smile thing . Just really feel what is going on. That might give you a clue.
Feather

Otoharo!

Prosperity,

I am sure this will not help you any. I grinned as I read your post, I know that feeling. I do not have that any more. It harkens back to what I said about blunt speech. There comes a time, when other people's opinion does not matter. That is when you will no longer feel nervous around anyone.

finaltiy

prosperity,

Hi.

In some cases the nervous smile is symptomatic of a "self-expression" issue (being oneself is, of course, a self-expression issue). Such 'expression' issues may be Throat Chakra related. Some energy work at Tanden and Throat Chakra may be helpful. In the meantime, just try to relax a little and enjoy the class.

"Acceptance by others" issues are, to some degree, reflective of projection (which can mean: "they don't accept us which really means we have some issue with accepting others; letting them get to know us)

Cheers,

RC

Hi there,
you are 'as GOOD as the next person', keep saying that to yourself & you will regain your selfconfidence...
no big issue, don't look 'to' deep into this or you will make yourself worse by being 'to' aware of it...
just keep saying to yourself " I AM just as good as you", when looking at some one,...eye contact is important, you will be fine & 'enjoy' the people & the classes..
luv Wendy x

prosperity,

maidin maith,

I remember, back in the dim and distant past, my old Dad telling me,"there are plenty of people as good as you, but nobody better".

If you think along those lines you won't go far wrong.

Slan go foille agus beannacht leat,

Brian

Hi Prosperity,

We all have a 'comfort zone', for some it is just with close friends and family, those we trust enough to let our guard down with. Others are very self confident and seem to feel at ease with everyone :)

You could try making a list of those you feel completely at ease with and others with whom you notice this nervousness and see if there's a pattern aside from the male/female factor.

Personally I feel much more at ease in female company as opposed to male (aside from my husband and trusted friends and family). I often feel very nervous in men's company. Personally I can track this back to childhood and see where it stems from and why.

It is actually very hard to control the micro signals that our body language gives away. We can be saying one thing and our body saying something completely different. Communication is about so much more than words, which is one of the reasons why autistic children have such a hard time :)

Gentle Blessings
Helen

Dear Prosperity,
We all have certain behaviours that tend to pop up in different situations...often we are not aware of it. Perhaps knowing you are about to take a class in psychology has you wondering about how you behave & why. Maybe also a bit of concern that certain behaviours might give you away before you even understand it yourself. When I was in nursing school some students would see themselves or friends in the lecture material & diagnose themself with some disorder... ( headache equals brain tumour, etc) usually we only "diagnosed" the teachers in psychological terms and often after exams!! HaHa...
Dont worry about other people. You may find that people "see" in others what they want to see or have been conditioned to see. That doesnt make it the truth.
Eye contact can be threatening if we dont want to connect with people, for whatever reason. Communication that has nothing to do with the spoken word surrounds us even if we try to modify or hide it, its just part of being human, we react to our environment. With the oposite sex that chemistry thing can be unsettling as well. But I have no idea why you react the way you do.
Prosperity, enjoy this class, you will learn so much and it may open some doors & shed some light. You may find that everyone you know fits into something you learn about. That helps to release some of the tension associated with why you react the way you do. Actually, you are the one with the answer to that question & it will come to you over time.
Have a good time in class....

peace & joy,
holobon

Greetings Finality,

Thanks for your post. I'm glad you could chuckle as it does sound a bit silly and I'm grateful you can relate. It makes sense as I do still care what some think of me yet it seems to be that only certain types affect me that way. Or vice versa. I felt a sense of relief at your response.
I will go to your blunt speech post as I have been away from Nexus for awhile and haven't read all the posts. Peace and...

blessings,

Prosperity

Dear Feather,

Hi. Thanks for the post. I so know I have to work on feeling more in my body as I'm usually tense and nervous by nature. Working on relaxing is a good re-reminder. thanks again.

peace,

Prosperity

Dear RC,

It sound logical and my first RM told me my throat chakra was blocked to work on that area more. It is true that I may have a fear of people getting to know me as I do feel like I am a boring person.

peace,

Prosperity

Greetings Wendy,

Thank you for that as I do not have too much confidence and do tend to feel less than. Affirming and reminding myself that I am as good as the next person is also a great re-reminder.

peace,

Prosperity

Dear Brian,

Sounds like you had a wise dad. Mine told me once I wasn't that great. I also tend to want to be around people who I believe are better in some way as if it may rub off on me. Maybe I need to change my perspective.

thanks, and peace,

blessings,

Prosperity

Dear Helen,

True as body language is key and we do all have comfort zones. I've noticed that some real good looking people also are ones I feel nervous around and that looking good is a key value in my family upbringing.
I also wonder if my nervous twitch is about the other person as well or a sign to me to avoid this person or something.
I also agree that this may be a good thing to journal about yet as someone else suggested not to get too deep into it.

peace,

Prosperity

Greetings Holoban,

I do tend to diagnose others and myself and I'm not even in nursing or psychology yet. The sexual chemistry thing can be an issue and maybe at least it says my hormones are working if anything. Thanks for your response.

peace,

Prosperity

It reminds me that Just for today, do not worry. thanks

Dear Prosperity,

It sounds like you are intune and brave to me.

namaste,
Michael

just out of interest go and look at gary craigs EFT site, i have recently purchased his video set and as i watch this huge selection of information i am in awe about how complex we humans are and yet something simple may completely consume our lifes and with some of the tapping methods show can have a tremendous effect on how you veiw the world.
happy days

andy

When you do this, don't worry about fixing anything right away, just work on noticing and paying attention to what you are feeling. Look at some of Pema Chodren's books for some guidance on this.
Peace,
Feather

Dear Feather,

Thanks for the mention of Pema Chrodren as I've almost picked up one of her books. Now I will definately do it.

peace,

Prosperity

Dear Michael,

Thank you for your kind words. I will write them down and put your comments on my gratitude list for today.

peace,

Prosperity

Dear Andyman,

Yes I agree as I do hear about this type of thing with different styles different names such as thought pattern management which I have seen. Could you list the website in the resources section please. On EFT if you are able.

Thanks,

peace,

Prosperity