The Reiki Cafe 

Haven't been here for a while , bit I wouldlike some advice. The past few years have been hard with my mother , brother and father passing away. I was hanging out with some friends that I thought were true blue and after the 3rd death in my family. they were very close apart. Iwas a caregiver in 2 of the situations. My so called friends disappeared. Now I get a call 2 years later from one of them to say hello. I don't know how to respond. really if at all. It was not only brutal losing family members but feeling abandoned by people who you thought were your close friends. I have forgiven but not forgotten. How should I respond in a genuine manner?????

Otoharo!

I am glad to hear your voice here regardless of your question. I don't know what I would do if in your situation. I usually say outright what I am feeling so I suppose I would say to that person what you have said to us. Of course I can say that to you as I need not be around for the rebuttal!

You have to do what is in you to do.

finality

dear eirelassey, I agree with finality...if you can share your feelings in a gentle way, not only would you be releasing some of it, but perhaps, they'd learn a little...about not letting a friend down. I'm so sorry for your losses....that could not have been easy at all. I've found that often....others are scared of death & dying & truly don't know how to help...so they just stay away. Please take good care of yourself, my friend.

Dear Aierlassy,
Well we humans don't quite have the loving consciousness of a dog yet have the memory of an elephant.
I had a friend who had a husband and x-husband who died and I called her a few years later and we agreed to meet for breakfast but my tooth was really sensitve and I needed a dentist so I called off the breakfast date and she seemed mildly disgusted. But she wasn't there for me as a friend when I needed her as she moved out of state without telling me. (before her husband died) She came back and after that her husband died unexpectedly and I saw the obituary but never attended the funeral. She had never tried to contact me after she came back and I've lived in the same house. So, she may or may not felt like I wasn't there for her but I have never told her how I felt she deserted me. You could always tell her how you feel. I could not tell my friend how I felt as she left and after years go by, it seems foolish to hang on to old hurts. Her husband who died did not like me and was jealous.
Peace,
Prosperity

Dear Eirelassy,

I agree with what Finality and Ponderings say. Letting her know that she made you feel abandoned at a crucial time is what I think you should do. Of course you're going to have feelings about her. It's probably best to get them out into the open.

Blessings,
Roxy

Hello,

I feel the same as the others. It is always best to keep open communication with any relation ship. It isn't always the easiest but it will always be the truest way to let people know what you feel. Because they could be wrapped up into themselves so tightly they may not notice the time that goes by.

love and light, harmony

Dear Eirelassy,
By the way, sorry about the deaths of your parents and brother. I reread my post and sounded a bit harsh. You always have options and I don't like to "should" on people. The best tip I have is to go by your gut. (intuition) Thanks for your post. Blessings to you and,
Peace,
Prosperity

Sorry to for your loses. Trust your heart and accept them back into your life only if you want to. People float in and out of our lives for a reason.